It has been a long, tiring day. No, make that a long, tiring week. 3 more Fridays until 9pm, 3 more full Saturdays, and my torment would be over. On a peaceful Saturday night, when I am all sweaty and drained after nearly 10 hours of running around in my second home with the people I am seeing far more often than my loved ones, all i want to do is to retreat into my peaceful room. I am turning into a no-life hermit.
There are lots of things i want to blog about: diva behavior, flower bouquets, the clutter on my desk. But I can’t bring myself to use my brains to structure what i want to share.
And on nights like this, The Blower’s Daughter by Damien Rice (also the theme song of Closer) is most apt. This song is slow, quiet, yet powerful and emotional, all at the same time. It soothes my frazzled nerves and provides me with a much needed avenue into which I can channel my exhaustion and frustration. Click to watch some snippets of Closer while listening to the song=)
Closer is one of my favourite films of all time. So many scenes left an impression. Natalie Portman’s first encounter with Jude Law’s character, Julia Robert capturing Portman’s extremely beautiful and teary face on film, the close-to-pornography, intensely sexual conversation between Portman and Clive Owen in a strip club, Owen and Robert’s fierce quarrel in which Owen demanded to know the sordid details of Robert’s affair with Law, when Portman finally left Law, and the last scene in which Portman turned heads with her stunning looks as she walked down the street.
Some people hated Closer- they found the film pretentious, ridiculous with its only saving grace the A-list cast. Closer is not a feel-good film. On the contrary, it quite determinedly leaves you cold. But I loved it because I found it real. It may not be how we feel all the time, it could be a little too extreme, but there is no doubt that it strikes a raw nerve because we know we could be or we are already feeling/thinking/doing the same things the characters felt/thought about/did.
The complex deceitful web of relationships between different people, the manipulative nature of man, the lies formed under the pretext of protecting others, the selfish needs of human beings to satisfy their own lustful desires, the near impossibility of staying faithful once monogamy is no longer deemed a virtue in society, how some people are not really in love with their partners but are rather in love with the idea of falling in love, how others sometimes pretend they don’t know the truth because they do not want to disrupt the harmonious order created from the untruths spun by those around them, how we are confused when we are being cheated on- part of us don’t want to know while the other part of us is dying from the insane urge to know exactly what the adulterous pair had done, how the classiest of men and women can become foul-mouthed, vulgarity-spewing shrews when things don’t go their way, how fear is most self-defeating, how our hearts can be broken by those we love and whom we thought loved us back in return, and most importantly, how life eventually goes on and how we will realise many years down the road that what hurt us then has become nothing more than a faint memory, and that what didn’t kill us had only made us stronger.